I’m Here Because Of You

“I’m Here Because Of You”

                Professionals in higher education are here because of students – we’re definitely not here to get rich. Passion is at the forefront of our work; it motivates us throughout our careers. In most cases, it’s safe for us to say to them “I’m here because of you.” Whenever I speak with student(s) for the first time, whether they be student staff that I’m supervising, a student group that I’m advising, or my first day with a new class that I’m teaching, I explain to them that I chose the field that I’m in because I truly love and enjoy working with students. Essentially, I tell them “I’m here because of you.” It is truly amazing and fulfilling to see the students we work with grow, try new things, learn, and develop during their time with us. But it wasn’t until I had a student say “I’m here because of you” to me, and I had the time (and opportunity) to reflect on it that I realized how gratifying what we do really is. This is a story of how I got a renewed passion for a career that I love (and have never lost love for) while still in my early years.

                Right out of graduate school I was lucky enough to land a great position working in residence life that also enabled me to teach and get my feet wet on the academic affairs side of the field. During my first year in this position I grew to know one of the residents living in my building pretty well, for this narrative we’ll call him Tom. Tom was a first year student with a great personality. He had a passion for helping others, and I could tell that he truly enjoyed learning and applying what he learned. Tom made a point of stopping by my office regularly (something very few students do); occasionally to chat, sometimes with questions, and others just for a quick “hi.” He was involved on campus and had a strong social network - I know because I routinely saw him at events. At one point towards the middle of the spring semester, Tom stopped by my office and I could tell he wasn’t in the best of moods. We chatted a little while, and it turned out that he wasn’t sure if he was going to come back to next year for a few different reasons. We chatted about it for a while, but when he left my office it was clear that he still had a lot going on in his head, but I thought it was pretty safe to say that he was going to be coming back. Throughout the rest of the semester we would talk sporadically, but I never did get a definitive answer on whether or not he was going to return in the fall. By the time the semester was winding down I had become less confident that I would see Tom the next year; he had spoken about taking a year off.

                During the summer I had to fire two of my newly hired RAs for not meeting the academic requirement. Knowing Tom as well as I did and his various character traits, I quickly reached out to him to see if he would be interested in becoming an RA for me; thankfully he agreed. While gearing up for the school year to start towards the end of summer break, Tom came to campus a couple of times to complete paperwork. On one of his visits to campus he mentioned something about needing to go talk to Student Financial Services; at the time it didn’t register that Tom had not planned to return.

                During his time as an RA Tom and I had our ups and downs, both professionally and personally. As with any student staff member, there was a fair amount of learning involved (for both of us), and we grew pretty close. He saw me on the day I got engaged, and the day my fiancé and I brought home our dog for the first time. I got to give him a hand shake and congratulate him on becoming president of the student body. Ultimately we got through the year on a good note, and I would like to think that we were both better for having had the opportunity to work together - I know I certainly am. At the end of the year Tom was one of the last RAs to leave for summer. He had asked if he could stop by my apartment to say good bye (keep in mind, I live in the residence hall) on his way out; of course I said yes. What he had to say will stick with me for the rest of my career, and likely the rest of my life. While he was shaking my hand he came in to give me a hug, and he said “I want to thank you, I’m here because of you.” I said thanks, but also tried to say that he had reached this point because of his own dedication and drive. But he insisted that if I hadn’t reached out to him to be an RA, and had confidence in him throughout the year, he would not be where he was. He told me that he likely would not have come back to school, so he wouldn’t have had the opportunities that he had as an RA, and he wouldn’t have become the student body president. Obviously it’s moments like this that we live for in this profession. After Tom left, my fiancé commented on how nice it was of him to say that, and I should feel good. I definitely did, but I didn’t think it would resonate with me months later.

                With the beginning of a new year comes convocation – a heartwarming and empowering experience in and of itself. For me, this year’s convocation was significantly more impactful than years past. I was incredibly proud to see Tom up on the stage with all of my institution’s big wigs. When his turn came he gave an outstanding speech welcoming the new first year students. Amid the roar of applause, I heard an older woman in the row just ahead of me yell, “That’s my grandson!” I realized that a good portion of the two rows in front of me were Tom’s family. As the procession that had been seated on the stage exited the building, I stole a glance at Tom’s grandmother. Her eyes were watering through an expression of immense pride that she shared with the rest of Tom’s family as they watched him walk out of the building amongst the most prestigious individuals that our institution has to offer. It was then that I heard Tom’s voice in my head saying, “I’m here because of you.”

                At the risk of sounding egocentric, I have to say that I have never felt more accomplished or better about myself than I did in that moment. Knowing that I played a part in a young man developing into a leader that his family is so proud of they yell it out in a packed auditorium is truly amazing. Seeing a grandmother with tears of pride welling up in her eyes, and knowing that I helped to make it happen makes all of the late nights and stressful weeks worth it. Times like this are what let me know that I chose the right profession.

                Please know that I did not tell this story to toot my own horn. Did I tell Tom’s grandmother what Tom told me—obviously not – and not just because of FERPA. As I left the auditorium, I stopped and let Tom’s family file out of their rows before I joined the throngs of people exiting, giving a nod to the grandmother who unknowingly had provided me with one of the greatest experiences/feelings of my life. I am writing this in hopes that it inspires one of you to reach out to a student and ask them to be something more. While I am a bit of a neophyte, still relatively new in the field, I have no doubt that this experience will stay with me forever. It will give me the strength to continue through tough times. You never know how your encouragement, challenge, guidance, support, advice or conversations with a student will shape them. Often times, we as professionals will have a desired [learning] outcome; sometimes the student(s) will far exceed them. Occasionally they won’t – and we may have to help pick them up after having fallen flat on their face. Sometimes they’ll let you know along the way how important you were in their process. Please, take the time and make the connections with students, then utilize those connections. I have no doubt that when you have an experience like this, it will keep you coming back for more!

Steve Schuh, Winthrop University    

Steve Schuh is a Residential Learning Coordinator and Academic Associate at Winthrop University.  He can be contacted by emailing shuhs@winthrop.edu.